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Osama
unveils new look in 9/11 video
By John Breneman
U.S. forces just missed nailing Osama bin Laden at a stylish
Pakistan beauty parlor last week. This from a source close
to the hairdresser who trimmed and dyed bin Laden's beard
for today's highly anticipated 9/11
anniversary video.
 In
another close call, Air Force B-2s bombed a heavily fortified
luxury spa remote Uzbekistan moments after bin Laden stopped
in for a manicure, pedicure and avocado mango butter facial.
Sources say the narcissistic terror kingpin likes to look
sharp for the anniversary of his Sept. 11, 2001, attacks on
America.
One year he bought himself a full-length mink coat. In 2007,
he sported a jaunty straw hat. And longtime bin Laden watchers
say his sense of fashion steadily improved since the embarrassing
cornrow fiasco of 1998.
"I would personally kill a man to get my hands on his
collection of cashmere shawls," said Amira Raj, editor
of Allah Girl and a leading authority on extremist Islamic
fashion trends.
 Last
month, she predicted bin Laden would have "work"
done on his signature beard, saying, "The ZZ Top look
is sooo 2005."
Raj noted that the Islamotainment industry is eager for a
sneak peak at bin Laden's incendiary new looks for Spring
2010.
In a related development: A spokesman confirmed that bin
Laden is no longer just a Grecian Formula Muslim Beard Club
member, he is now the president.
Posted on September 11, 2009 2:25 PM
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