Rapper
50 Cent introduces 50 Scent

By
John Breneman

Imagine the dangerous aroma of a freshly fired 9mm semiautomatic
handgun. Blend in the rich, pungent aroma of a burlap sack
stuffed with $100 bills. Now add a delightfully naughty whiff
of urban skank ho.

Introducing 50 Scent — a gangsta-licious new fragrance created
by platinum-toothed rapper 50 Cent.

Just dab some on your neck, behind your ear and all around
your groin area to drive the ladies wild. Or slather some
on that unsightly machete scar to make old wounds with sizzle
with brutish sensuality.

"Mr. 50 is a smart businessman. He know he can slap
his name and picture on any damn thing and sell millions,"
said a high-ranking member of the rapper’s entourage, pausing
briefly to shoot a young man who got too close to 50 Cent’s
security phalanx.

"I mean just look at P. Diddy. That (bleep) can go the
bathroom, take a big old crap and sell it for $100. Call it
P. Shizzle."

Negotiations are reportedly under way to create a whole line
of 50 Cent products ranging from guns, knives and numchucks
to bath beads, potpourri and exfoliating creams. Coming
soon: a hedonistic aftershave with complimentary straight
razor.

50 Scent is available at a perfume counter near you.
Manufacturer’s suggested retail price: 50 Dollar.

Related story:
Scent
of a pop tart: Britney’s new fragrance — Dec.
15, 2004