Sharpton
slaps Santa for saying ‘ho’

By
Chris Elliott

The
Rev. Al Sharpton has set his sights on the North Pole
over what he calls "Santa’s casual and constant use of
the word ‘ho’."

"Calling
any woman a ‘ho’ is demeaning and abusive and it should not
be tolerated on any level. With Santa it’s always, ho this,
and ho that, and then pretty soon it’s ho ho ho with that
fat old cracker," said Sharpton. "People cut him
slack because of his philanthropy, but I am tired of watching
him denigrate our beautiful black sisters. I didn’t let Imus
get away with it and, as popular as he is, Santa won’t get
away with it either. Racism in America is perpetuated by ignorance
and hate, and I plan to micromanage the language people are
permitted to use by claiming that the word ‘ho’ is a setback
to civil rights and the advancement of equality."

Santa issued the following terse statement via reindeer express:
"Tell Sharpton I’m making him a Tawana Brawley doll.
It tells lies until you slap it around a little bit, ho ho
ho!"

Related story:
Bush
eyes Santa for Cabinet post — Dec. 19, 2006